Friday, May 27, 2011

FINALLY Summer 2011!!

This semester was by far the most stressful of my college career. By the grace of God, I got through it, passing everything except my piano proficiency, but hey, I'll take that!! It has been a crazy semester, to say the least, with the load of classes and all the stupid politics going on in the school administration. I am beyond grateful that it is finally over!!

This Summer has not been the least bit boring. First Borders closed, so the first week of my summer I was working for them as they were liquidating for a final week. Then it was time to find a job, which thankfully, I have, at Starbucks, and I'm loving it so far. But other than work, there have been bachelorette parties, car troubles, choir rehearsals, cement pouring... there has not been a dull moment yet. There is always something to do, and that's probably because, to some extent, I have to catch up on all the things I couldn't do during the semester!! I swear, if you are a full time student who works, you really have to put your life on hold to do what you need to do. I've got one more year of putting my life on hold, and it really sucks, from that perspective. I'm about to be 24, and I'm feeling it.

I feel... stuck in a rut. I'm not ashamed of living at home. I'm not ashamed of being single; in fact, I'm kinda proud of it because I have not settled for anyone, and I never will. However, in all honesty, I am sick of being stuck in those two situations. I feel that my job at Starbucks is a stepping stone to getting out on my own because I'm getting paid more by the hour than I have anywhere else. Also, I'm in the beginnings of setting up my own Mary Kay business. I never thought I'd be one of those women, and in all honestly, I do not really fit in with them, but it seems like a good opportunity that could actually get me somewhere, if I put enough effort into it. I hope I'm moving in the right direction...

...But I know I'm still going to be at home and probably single a year from now... and that makes my soul hurt. I'm trying to keep an open mind and say, "anything could happen," but come on... I've still got a year of school left... I won't have time for crap else. And even after that, I'll be starting my life!! for real! Trying to get out on my own, and hopefully become a self-sufficient adult!! That's going to take a hell of a lot of work, too. So... when is life going to happen? People keep saying, it'll happen when I least expect it. Well I'm almost 24.... and I'm sick of being patient. What does God want from me?! I don't understand.

Song: Make You Fell My Love -- Adele

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